A few things I would tell younger me…

She pulled her hair back, and squinted her eyes. Maybe if she didn’t look too hard, she might see something she deemed as beautiful looking back at her. The mirror never lied, she told herself. I am ugly. She thought long and hard about what it must be like to have perfect hair. Stick straight hair, like the popular girls at school.

She wished her thick, curly, (and at the time) unmanageable, frizzy hair away, almost daily.

There was a list actually, in her mind, of the things she would change about herself, if she could.

Looking back, if she had gotten her way, she would have been left with nothing more than a shadow of who she really was. And totally unrecognizable.

Today, she’s glad not one of those wishes came true.

If I could go back and tell little Fran a few things, I’d start with her hair.

Girl, keep it. Own it. Grow it long.

One day, that will set you apart. And like the Bible says, it is your glory. 

And those eyelashes, they don’t need clumps of mascara. They’re long, they’re not very thick, but that’s how God made them.

And you might not have the best people skills on the block, in your neighborhood, or in your state- but you have a voice. Write. And let your heart spill it’s everything onto paper. One day it will help someone.

True happiness is not from without, it is from within. And there is no greater joy than to know you have made a difference, big or small, in someone else’s life.

And right now your parents are probably annoying you, but be good to them. Keep their hearts safe, and don’t break them. One day you will be a parent, and the decisions they are making for you will make more sense than you ever imagined.

And whether you believe it or not, little Fran, you are an artist. Regardless of what your silly professors say (remember they teach at SHSU, not Parsons!), you will do something with the talent God gave you, one day. Don’t let anyone convince you to put down your paintbrush, or any medium that happens to strike your fancy.

Be patient, dreams don’t happen overnight. Not usually, and almost NEVER in the way you expected.

And boys. Oh, my. We could camp out here for a while. But don’t give your heart away too soon. One day, when you least expect it, you’ll meet the man who will love you more than life itself. It’s your true heart’s desire, and it will happen.

But not with any guy from high school, or college – so stay focused on having a good time with the beautiful friends God sends your way… and… you know, studying.

And one day little Fran, your heart will break. You will lose confidence in those you trust. You will feel like the world has been taken from under your feet. But this will prepare you for the biggest storm of your life.

Keep your head high, your nose in His book, and your heart ever crying out to the only One who can make the sun shine again.

When that big storm comes, remember that Heaven is real and stay close to the One who brought you out of the last storm that you thought you would never survive.

He will make the sun to shine again, and when it does, let the sun embrace your broken soul. The warmth of the day will be refreshing, and something about living through this experience will make life more precious than it’s ever been.

And one day, you will realize that while you were struggling to merely survive this incredible storm, this gift fell in your lap. A gift to see life with raw eyes, an open heart, a non-judgmental spirit, and walking with a caution to not waste a second.

You will have a son. He will constantly be bringing tears to your eyes, because of the joy that has been restored. You will see him, and get glimpses of his sister in his eyes, his nose, and in the unexplainable moments that you get to witness.

Life will not be the way you hope and plan, it will be better, in it’s own way. Don’t fight the path God sends you on, little fran… embrace it.

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  1. 1
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    Stephanie D says:

    That is beautiful Fran!
    Stephanie D recently posted..BittersweetMy Profile

  2. 2
    2

    I love this:

    “And one day, you will realize that while you were struggling to merely survive this incredible storm, this gift fell in your lap. A gift to see life with raw eyes, an open heart, a non-judgmental spirit, and walking with a caution to not waste a second.”

    Oh, and this:

    “Life will not be the way you hope and plan, it will be better, in it’s own way. Don’t fight the path God sends you on, little fran… embrace it.”

    So true of any trial, not just loss. Life rarely goes the way we plan. The beauty and growth comes in our wisdom and our pain, and in our choice to still see the joy and beauty in the midst of the hard.

    Thank you.
    Jennifer LeBlanc recently posted..Journey to Brave: The Realities of Daily PainMy Profile

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    Stefanie says:

    Beatifully written Fran. Thank you for sharing your wonderful gift from God. You touch my life time and time again.

  4. 4
    4
    Arcadia says:

    Such a beautiful, beautiful post…
    Arcadia recently posted..Right Where I Am 2012: 2 Months, 2 Weeks, 4 Days.My Profile

  5. 5
    5
    Melissa says:

    Stunning!

  6. 6
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    Sarah says:

    Super duper beautiful, Fran. So, so true and I especially identify with the joy of seeing in your child glimpses of the one you are missing. Happens all the time. Tears in my eyes. Thank you, so much for writing this.
    Sarah recently posted..Scenes from Lily’s Birthday PartyMy Profile

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    Tiffany says:

    “True happiness is not from without, it is from within. And there is no greater joy than to know you have made a difference, big or small, in someone else’s life.”

    This is so true!
    Tiffany recently posted..guitar sheet music booksMy Profile

  8. 8
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    jennifer says:

    Life is full of unexpected things that make us more stronger and well effective person who are able to survive what ever comes along….
    jennifer recently posted..server data recoveryMy Profile

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